Recently I’ve been reading Sundar Dalton: Seeker of Transcendental Beauty, written, compiled and put together by his old friend Trishatur LaGalia. You can find it, and buy it, here:
https://www.amazon.com/Sundar-Dalton-Seeker-Transcendental-Beauty/dp/3895323942
Obviously Trishatur put a lot of care and thought into this book. Sundar’s gentle nature and humor fill every page. This book has given me a lot of delight to read. Please buy it and read it. I am now on my first reading, but I think I will read it many more times.
—–
In the poem that I shared recently on this site, Samarra, I included lines like:
“Every man is your walking stick”
And
“I will support your steps”
A few days after I finished the poem, I disembarked from the Number 49 Bus that takes me within a block of my house, and immediately slipped on the ice and broke my foot. I recited Samarra for the doctor in the emergency room and he laughed as he passed me my new walker and said, “It sounds like you were ready for this!”
It’s a fifth metatarsal fracture, which is the most common kind of foot fracture. I will have to wear my orthopedic “boot” for another month, but I can put weight on the injured foot which is a very good thing. It took me three days to see my specialist, which just meant that, during those three days I had to hop everywhere on one foot, including up six flights of stairs.
It takes me usually five minutes to walk to the bus stop. Hopping on one foot, it took me forty-five minutes. Forty-five grueling minutes of acrobatics. But I kept imagining I was back in my marathon years, at mile nineteen, chasing down the remaining distance, and I brought forward that spirit and energy. I don’t run marathons at this point in my life, but the essence is still there inside me. I can pull it out when I need to. It’s interesting, isn’t it, that nothing we do in the spiritual life is wasted. Everything can come in handy.
A disciple once asked Guru a question about her chronic disability and persistent pain. And Guru said that this experience might be useful to her, either later in life or in a future incarnation. It’s not a waste.
Fortunately, two or three days later, I saw my specialist who told me it was fine to put weight on the foot as long as I’m wearing the boot, and so I stopped my sack-race.
For the few days prior to my accident I had been in an aggravated, irritated consciousness. Winters are hard for me. I get lonely. I stay here in my garret, carving my name into the wall with a penknife using the Greek alphabet/s.
I remember the night before the accident I dealt with a nasty cashier at my local pharmacy, but I was equally nasty to him. I guess when I used to work at the fancy supermarket I always tried to give outstanding service, so I can get a little huffy when I don’t get it myself. But that night I probably should have just kept my mouth shut. I left the store with a black cloud over my head.
That morning, before I went to work (not in the prison high school for once), I looked at the Transcendental and tried to offer it my lousy consciousness. I felt I made contact, I felt bathed in light, and I also felt that maybe I will be able to accept what comes cheerfully.
And that’s an important lesson for me. To just cheerfully accept whatever comes.
On Friday I read Guru’s 1977 book Obedience or Oneness all the way through, and yesterday I read it two more times. I was thumbing through it this morning and I noticed that I have underlined every single word in the book! What’s the point of underlining if you’re going to underline everything? I’ll have to get a highlighter next!
A passage I like is this one, on page 4:
“When I become aware that a problem has been dealt with inwardly, then my mind may ask my soul what was done on the physical plane and what is going to happen now. Otherwise the soul may not necessarily give the message to the physical mind. In the ordinary human life, unless the mind is aware of something, we feel that we do not know about it. But although our physical mind may not know something, another part of our being may be aware of it.”
(From Obedience or Oneness by Sri Chinmoy)
So I knew I was going to have an accident on some level! I knew this. Without practicing the spiritual life, I don’t think I would get this kind of fore knowledge.
——
At my job, I usually don’t have anything to do. The school district just wants substitute teachers to serve as warm bodies in the classroom so that the kids are not left unattended. But they all have their assignments on the chromebooks, so they just tap away and I sit at my desk and watch art documentaries on my phone, or study Guru’s books or write poetry. It’s not a bad gig, not at all.
Last week I worked (?) at a school on the near West side. The students were all refugees, half from Venezuela and half from Ukraine. I speak Spanish enough to dialogue at a basic level. And from working in Guru’s restaurants for so many years I do know conversational Ukrainian as well. Since the teacher hadn’t bothered to leave me any lesson plans, I just decided I would teach the kids each other’s languages! It was fun watching the Venezuelans attempt Russian! And the Ukrainians were completely baffled by Spanish pronunciation!
So much of language is in emotional projection and energy. You have to feel the vibration of the people to speak the language. When you say the Spanish word “La Verdad” (the truth), you have to identify yourself with how Spanish speakers use that word, how it feels to them. It’s a masculine-feeling word, even with its feminine article, and it implies honor, and duty to one’s family, as well as just fact-stating. In the same way, the word “Pravda”, the word for truth in Slavic languages, even though it means the same thing as “La Verdad” in Spanish, yet it carries a different weight and energy. Pravda to me smacks of sacred revelation, or something you would keep close to your chest and only confide to a few extremely close friends. So it’s not enough just to be able to pronounce the words. You have to know the people, the consciousness that flows through their language, in order to say the words properly.
At the same time, it was funny to watch them struggle with such strange words! I taught each group folk sayings from the other group’s language. It was a fun day.
I noticed the Venezuelans and Ukrainians sat in their own groups, but they still seemed friendly towards each other. They recognized they were all refugees. A black kid came into the classroom in the middle of the day, playing hookie from his scheduled class. All the kids, from both countries, greeted him enthusiastically, and he listened to my cross-cultural lesson for a few minutes and said, “This tight!” and some other things I can’t print. Soon he was asleep.
The following day I worked at another school, closer to my house. But at this school, every door was kept locked all the time, and they do not provide subs with keys. So I had to ask the security guard to let me in to the faculty lounge, the bathroom, and my classroom, all day long. They don’t trust the subs. They think we’re going to steal the keys. Well, when you’re the “sub”, last in line, the last dam between an ordered school and complete chaos, well you learn to get used to being invisible. But at least I get to pursue my hobbies and read Guru’s books all day. I’ll take it.